All words have meaning. There are formal definitions that you’d find in a reputable dictionary. And then there are the real definitions: the ones that remain unspoken. That’s why the Uselesstuff® Dictionary exists.

phi·los·o·phy (n.):
1. helping you make others look dumber since the beginning of civilization;
2. a discipline to help understand why others are dumber than you;
3. helping delude you into assuming that you’re less dumb than other people since you thought you started learning the subject.

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Comedy can be cruel. It’s what makes the pen mightier than the sword. It’s what cuts tyrants down to size. For the most part, comedy may seem out of place. But it’s also the best way to distill the absurdity of everyday life into something cogent. Comedy is the most underrated and under-appreciated form of philosophy. Enough said. Now buy the damn design.

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Feeling frustrated that everybody is questioning your undoubted brilliance? Then this design is for you. Now, no-one will make fun of you any more. And this is just one of six designs: one for every day of the year. Buy them all.

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Feeling frustrated that British people don’t recognize how brilliant you are? Then this design is for you. Now, nobody will make fun of you any more. And this is just one of ten designs: one for every day of the week. Buy them all.

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Feeling frustrated that nobody else recognizes how brilliant you are? Then this design is for you. Now, no-one will make fun of you any more. And this is just one of ten designs: one for every day of the week. Buy them all.

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